Loaded Potatoes, Redeemed

The loaded potato is notoriously awful, health-wise. I mean, if you really didn't clog your arteries with all the butter and sour cream on a normal restaurant-style baked potato, go ahead and add bacon and cheese whiz to put you over the edge. Thanks a lot, T.G.I. Friday's.

Well, it's not the potato's fault that corporate America stuffed it with crap, so I decided to redeem it. There's a little nod to the 80s in this recipe, too, because it is also a twice-baked potato. But not the kind with the piped swirl on top. So, if you also think the loaded potato deserves another chance, do this:

Cube one smallish sweet potato or yam and steam* until tender. Meanwhile, bake up two stuffable-sized potatoes, along with a few whole garlic cloves. Scoop out the inside of the baked potato, keeping the skin intact, and mash in a bowl with the sweet potato, garlic cloves, a bit of grated Parm, and some S & P. When it tastes good, return the mixture to the potato skins. The rest is up to you, but stay away from bacon and tube cheese or you'll ruin everything. I topped mine with caramelized sweet onions and sauteed crimini mushrooms with fresh thyme from the garden, and a very light sprinkling of organic sharp cheddar (a little goes a long way). That goes back into the oven until it's all bubbly and brown. (There's the twice baked part.) And, as if all of that weren't enough, I finished it off with a dollop of fat free plain yogurt and some chives, also from the garden. The tang of the yogurt is a great compliment to the sweetness of the potato innards. The best part about this whole thing is that you can eat it sans-guilt and save yourself the braincells you'd otherwise lose during a meal at a greasy chain restaurant. Thank God it's not pasteurized processed cheese product.

Sprinkle some paprika on top to complete the 80s charm.

We had some leftover guac in the fridge that was also a great topper.

Serve with the Wood Brothers' latest album, Loaded.

*Steaming is one of most nutritious ways to prepare food because it allows the vegetable to retain all those great vitamins and minerals you are counting on ingesting that can otherwise be lost during cooking. Also, the yogurt and sweet potato in this recipe not only make it taste really good, but also add a list of health benefits too long to write out without boring you, so just click on the links to learn more.

My Veggie Burger, the Hero

Behold...
...the coveted and ethereal 11-cup Pro Custom Cuisinart Food Processor! This sacred machine finally graces my kitchen, after a lifetime of sacrifice, devotion, and meticulous dicing. The Chopper, the Shredder, and the Dough Mixer in one. Terra pax and so forth. Amen.

Right, so I got a new food processor. Yeah!!! I'm finally a real cook! My last one was a cheap mess, but it did die an honorable death in battle. (Jesse and I had it pinned down from either side, both trying to force the lid off after it's last bout with biscuit dough. The dough survived, but the bowl cracked all Liberty Bell-style.) I scored this new FP for a ridiculous deal and have been prancing around it proudly for days now.
My favorite accessory is the How-To DVD. Yes, I watched it. No, I'm not always that big of a loser.

OK, enough babbling and gawking...what am I gonna make with this thing? Something that requires a hell of a lot of fine chopping is the key so I can a) save time and b) try out every attachment and scoff at my lowly knives in the corner. The answer: veggie burgers!

If you just lost interest, I urge you to keep reading. The veggie burger has gotten one of the worst bum raps in gastronomy. I think this mostly comes from people who eat veggie burgers because they really want a hamburger and they're trying to sneakily disguise it. That usually doesn't work out because, well, it is difficult to replace a cow with a carrot, know what I mean? But, if you treat the veggie burger as its own entity -- just a delicious (and nutritious) sandwich -- it's really quite good. Here is my version:

The key is flavor. This may sound obvious, but vegetarian fare has also gotten all wrapped up in the bad zone due to its common lack of flavor. I seriously urge you to try this bundle of joy and tell me it has any relation to cardboard. Try it!

La Receta:
Using your new 11-cup Pro Custom Cuisinart Food Processor (herein after, "the FP"), chop:

-one medium sweet onion
-one large clove of garlic
-one red bell pepper (seeds and ribs removed)
-0ne serrano chile (seeds and ribs removed unless you like it HOT)
-a heaping handful of crimini mushrooms

Smile adoringly at how easy that was. Saute in a large skillet with olive oil. Now, using the shred attachment of the FP, shred:

-one medium carrot
-one medium parsnip

Smile again. Add to saute pan. Now switch to the slice attachment of the FP, and finely slice:

-one smallish bunch of Italian kale*

Add to saute pan. Laugh at how long that would have taken you without the FP. (If you are using a knife for this...I'm sorry for you.)

The mixture in the pan should start to come together sort of like, well, ground beef! To that, add about a tbsp of chili powder, a tsp each of cumin, salt, and cocoa powder, some turns of fresh black pepper, and a handful of dried cherries. (I actually used dried cranberries this time because that's what I had on hand. Still good.) Last, add about 3/4 can of black beans and mash some of them. Incorporate the whole mixture and taste it. If it's good enough to eat alone, it's done. If not, season to your tastes. Form into burger-like shapes and lightly sear each side in olive oil. I topped these with some incredible aged Manchego (thanks, Scott!), sliced semi-firm avocado, crunchy frisée, and some Jufran's Hot Banana Sauce. This sandwich has a decidedly Latino flare, which makes it even more heroic in my book. The addition of cocoa powder was inspired by Oaxacan mole, Manchego is a Spanish cheese, and avocados are very common in Cuban cuisine. Oh, and the banana sauce is Philippino, but it feels like the same family. My intention was to make sweet potato fries or tostones with this, but it was getting pretty late so we had chocolate chip cookies from the dough in the fridge instead.

Enjoy this health and flavor powerhouse with your old Jimmy Cliff mix. Not only will you be the hero of your veggie-averse friends, but you'll be helping them see clearly now, and for years to come. If Cool Runnings is on TV...bonus.

*Various studies have been done on eye health and diet. Kale is apparently the best thing you can eat to maintain healthy vision. Jesse has eye issues, so we eat kale regularly and it is surprisingly versatile and delicious. This sandwich is also packed with other antioxidant-rich ingredients, like carrots, avocado, and garlic, that contribute to strong eye cells and tissues.

Pastafacarol

This dish was inspired by three things:

1. A recipe I saw on Food TV while salivating on the stair climber.
2. A new mandoline that I recently received as a gift.
3. My dear friend Carol, who likes to create her own pasta dishes at restaurants.

I had picked up a zucchini and some Meyer lemons on my latest adventure at the Food Front Co-Op, and I saw this recipe on TV that would allow me to use the zucchini and my new mandoline. Yes! Multitasking is so productive. So, first thing's first: figure out the mandoline. If you have one and have lost your instructions, too, here is a nice link for you. I'm sure you think you can do it on your own, and maybe you can, but I strongly advise removing the chip from your shoulder just for now so as not to julienne or waffle-cut your phalanges.

Thanks to this website, I was able to go from this:
To this:

Fingers intact and all. Anyway, the whole point of the julienned zucchini is to have it mimic spaghetti in the dish, therefore requiring you to use less pasta. It's a "healthy meal," see? But, of course, the eternal supply of rogue boxes of spaghetti in the various pantries of my life had somehow finally been depleted, just when I needed them most. Great. There was also a nice basil oil from the recipe on TV that was supposed to finish the dish, but when I opened the fresh-from-TJ's box of organic basil, it was all moldy and nasty. WTF? Things are not going well.

So, here's what happened:

Boil water for pasta. If you have somehow fallen into the 2% of Americans without spaghetti in the pantry like me, use whatever you have. I settled for organic penne rigate. (A note about boiling pasta. Really salt that water good. My friend and chef mentor once told me it should be "like the sea." This is your one chance to flavor the pasta itself, so don't be skimpy.)

Mince about 3 large cloves of garlic and saute in 1/4 cup extra virgin olive oil until light brown. Toss in a tsp or so of crushed red pepper flakes. Chop up a few tbsp each of fresh basil (preferably the unmoldy kind) and flat leaf Italian parsley, then toss in the pan and remove from heat immediately. When pasta is al dente ("to the tooth," in Italian), drain and throw it in with the garlic and herbs, along with a few tbsp of its cooking water. Toss with zucchini, the juice of half a Meyer lemon, and freshly grated Parmigiano-Reggiano cheese. Season to taste with S&P. Top with lots of grated Parm and some fresh Meyer lemon zest.


This actually turned out really well, despite the slight mishaps along the way. If you're in the mood for a healthier pasta with some veggies to boot, give this a try. It's a great "light and fresh" pasta dish, free from the shackles of bolognese or alfredo, just like Carol likes it. I'd like to think that if this was on the menu in an Italian restaurant, she just might order it. Maybe...

Pair this with some Al Green and maybe just one more glass of wine. Mucho fun!

And now I'd like to take a moment to thank a few special people, without whom this dish wouldn't be possible: First, Grandaddy and Dani for the wonderful mandoline. I can't wait to make waffle fries! Second, Michael Chiarello, for being on TV while I was hungry at the gym. And last, but not least, Carol, for never settling for just what's on the menu.

Hangover Miang Khum

Question: What do you do when you're hungover and have a fridge full of left over pulled pork?
Answer: Turn it into Thai food!

Thai food is my ultimate hangover food. Something about the balance of all five taste sensations paired with the capsaicin high and fry oil create this magical cure-all that I just can't resist. After a big night out, I literally wake up craving Pad Kee Mao.

We had a good amount of left over pulled pork, but after all the festivities and vodka drinks, the thought of another pork sandwich made my stomach turn. Also, we were out of BBQ sauce. So, out came the Asian market bounty: soy, palm sugar, chili-garlic sauce, galangal (Thai ginger), Sriracha, fish sauce, and a handful of limes. I somehow managed to get all of that into a sauce pot and simmered it just a bit to dissolve the palm sugar, then poured it over the pork and let it marinate for a while. I figured something good would come of that.

After a slow, muddled thought process and some glazed over stares into the cupboards, I finally decided on a sort of Miang Khum-ish dish. Miang Khum is a traditional Thai street snack that usually involves shredded coconut, diced limes, ginger, roasted peanuts, dried shrimp, shallots, and diced chiles. All of this stuff gets sprinkled into a spinach leaf and wrapped up with a sweet brown sauce. It's sort of like a Thai taco bar. My friend Scott, the Thai aficionado, described it as little bites of flavor explosions...or something like that. My version was supposed to be a main dish, so the addition of pork made it significantly more substantial. It went something like this:

Dice up little piles of the following:

-roasted peanuts
-limes (skins and all)
-fresh mango
-chile peppers
-cilantro

Set aside. Take a head of cabbage and remove leaves, keeping them whole so they can hold the flavor explosions you're about to fill them with.

Make a dipping sauce. Mine was the same ingredients as the marinade. I think ideally it should be sweet, salty, tangy, and spicy. (i.e. palm sugar, fish sauce, soy, lime juice, chili-garlic sauce, ginger) Simmer until sugar is dissolved and you get a nice saucy consistency. Pour into a bowl and set aside.

Dice shallots and yellow bell peppers and saute until soft. Chop up marinated pork and add to saute pan. The slight char on the bits of pork add both flavor and texture.

Now the fun begins. Grab a cabbage leaf and fill it with all the stuff you just prepared. The amount of flavor that you get out of one bite is really astounding. You get saltiness from the peanuts and pork, sweetness from the mango, tanginess from the limes, spice from the chiles, brightness from the cilantro, and just enough fattiness from the pork to coat the unsettled stomach. And on top of all that, it's actually pretty healthy. Score!

So, there you have it: the perfect hangover food. Enjoy with some nice, quiet Thelonious Monk and a big glass of water.

Note: Adjust the amount of spice depending on how hungover you are and how much heat you can tolerate. Ideally, the more the better, in my opinion. Capsaicin, the spice-producing compound found in chile peppers, has many health benefits, including properties for hangover relief. Check it:

"It is common for people to experience pleasurable and even euphoriant effects from eating capsaicin-flavored foods. Folklore among self-described "pepperheads" attributes this to pain-stimulated release of endorphins."

See, no pain, no gain.

Mangia Lasagna!

Sometimes I wake up and just want to eat Italian food. It was a cold, windy, rainy, all-in-all weather suck fest this weekend and to me, some slow-cooked Italian red sauce and a carb-fiesta is the ultimate remedy. Also, I had signed up to participate in the 8K Shamrock Run the following morning (why, I do not know), so I used the old "pasta dinner" high school athlete trick as my other excuse for the meal. I decided on lasagna and tried to experiment a little along the way.

The first step to most Italian sauces is a good old soffritto. In Italian, soffritto literally means "sub-fried" because of the low temperature used to sweat your aromatic veggies. The most common soffritto in Northern Italy is onions, carrots, and celery, and it is used as a base for many soups, stews, sauces, etc. The onions, carrots, and celery are traditionally in a radio of 2:1:1. French cuisine refers to this combination as a mirepoix, and in New Orleans they replace the carrot with green bell pepper and call it the "Holy Trinity." This is just another attempt at building street cred. I know I could have just said onions, carrots, and celery. But hey, now you have more interesting stuff to talk about in a moment of awkward silence.

So, I heated some olive oil in a large, heavy stock pot and softened up a soffritto of onions, carrots, and celery over low heat. I used one Washington sweet onion, one carrot, and one celery stalk. After they sweat it out and the onions were translucent, I then threw in about a tbsp of chopped fresh garlic and 3-4 tbsp of tomato paste. After everything was incorporated, I added two 28 oz. cans of Italian plum tomatoes (whole), a heavy dose of Italian seasoning, and some fresh basil leaves. I let this simmer for a while so everyone could get to know each other. After about 1/2 hr, I pureed everything (in small batches) until smooth and returned it to the pot. Added a chiffonade of about 8 large basil leaves (see, foreign words make you sound professional!), and tasted it.

Something was still missing...what the hell was it? Then I remembered my dad's words of wisdom:

"Amelia, you want to know the secret to good red sauce? Pork fat."

Well, he's damn right, and I had completely forgotten this important step, so I ran to the store and picked up some mild Italian sausage links. (I prefer half mild, half hot, but they had no hot so whatev.) Took the casings off, tore them in half and plopped them into the steaming pot. I also added some crushed red pepper flakes to make up for the mildness. This did the trick, as always. Thanks, Dad!

Experiment #1: Ameliorated Ricotta Filling

My boyfriend hates white creamy substances in his food. He loves lasagna, but the ricotta/cottage cheese/sour cream part has to be pretty well disguised. So, I decided the make it a little more healthy by reducing the amount of cheese without reducing the amount of filling. We eat with our eyes first, remember. I saw a recipe for parsnip puree recently, so that was my inspiration. Chop 5-7 parsnips (unless they're really big, then use less) and put them in a sauce pot with about 4 lightly smashed garlic cloves. Just barely cover with skim milk, add S&P, and simmer until fork-tender. Puree and season to taste. From there, I combined the parsnips with an equal amount of ricotta cheese and about half a bag of cooked spinach. The parsnips can have a strong flavor, but the ricotta really balances them out and it adds a great background sweetness to your lasagna. "Why is this so good?!" People will say. Never tell them it's because of parsnips.*

Experiment #2: No Boil Noodles

Alright, this wasn't really an experiment so much as laziness that I thought was well-founded. I've tried these before and never had an issue with them. Some people think it's wrong or whatever, but like I said, short cuts that don't disrupt the flavor or quality factor of your food are never wrong in my book. And wow, this really speeds up the process.

It was assembled as follows:
Spread some sauce on the bottom of a 9x13" baking dish. Top with 4 noodles. Top with more sauce, then a few slices of provolone, some grated mozzarella, and your secret ricotta mixture. Repeat until you have used 16 noodles. The top layer should just be noodles, then sauce, then mozzarella and some freshly grated Parmigiano. Now just cover and bake at 350 degrees for 45 minutes, then uncover and bake for another 10-15 minutes until the top is bubbly and the cheese is browned.

I served this to 3 hungry dudes who had just finished a day of skiing/snowboarding on Hood and it was a hit. And two of them have Italian moms or grandmas who have been making this shit for them all their lives.

Oh, by the way, the sausage doesn't go in the lasagna. Just let people take it out of the sauce to enjoy on the side.
I forgot to photograph anything the night we ate this, so I reheated some for lunch the next day and this is it. Notice the mircowave splatter. I was about to wipe this off like a good little cook, but then I thought it looked kind of cool. Maybe reheated sauce splatters are the micro-wave of the food presentation future...

*Some info about the parsnip: it is actually higher in vitamins and minerals than its more popular friend, the carrot. It is an excellent source of potassium and dietary fiber. So, you can use this method to sneak healthy vegetables into things without anyone even knowing about it! Ha!

Jesse's Pizza

As a self-diagnosed food addict, I realize that I am at high risk for also being afflicted by food snobbery. And in some ways, I welcome it. However, I actually do make a conscious effort to not let it "go to my head." (Thighs or love-handles, sure...go ahead.) I've asked my friends to slap me if I ever make a dish with gold leaves or foam. (No offense to those of you who use these ingredients. I know they have a time and place. I just don't think it's very often...) As I've mentioned before, Portland is a mecca for high quality grocery stores and markets that offer high quality ingredients, so when you're lucky enough to get something naturally fabulous...don't mess with it! Here's a great recipe that lets your awesome veggies shine. It's healthy, flexible, simple, AND always delicious.

First of all, one of my favorite Food TV pastimes is making fun of Sandra Lee with my mom. (Please also slap me if I ever start coordinating my outfits with my kitchen decor.) That being said, she does have a point. There is nothing wrong with taking short cuts if they don't take away from the quality of the result. If you are lucky enough to have a Trader Joe's in your town, check out the refrigerated section for their fresh pizza dough. You can buy it in plain, whole wheat, and garlic and herb, and it's always really good. This is short cut #1. For Jesse's pizza, we like whole wheat. (But if you think whole wheat dough is sacrilege, go ahead and use whatever you deem appropriate.) While we're talking about TJ's, their Mediterranean hummus is also chronic. Yes, chronic. We love it. We should probably buy stock in it. This is short cut #2. You can make homemade dough and homemade hummus for this recipe if you want, which I've done, but it's a lot more work and honestly, not THAT much better...

So here's what you need:

-one ball of fresh pizza dough
-your favorite hummus
-your favorite vegetables
-feta cheese
-your favorite herbs

What? I said it's flexible! OK, more accurately, here is what I used for this recipe:

-one ball of TJ's fresh whole wheat pizza dough
-Oregon crimini mushrooms
-Roma tomatoes
-Washington sweet onions (eat your heart out, Vidalias!)
-fresh spinach
-broccoli florets
-low fat crumbled feta cheese
-dried oregano
-freshly grated Parmigiano-Reggiano cheese
-freshly ground black pepper

Roll out the dough and spread with hummus. Top with veggies, cheese, oregano, and black pepper. Bake in a preheated 450 degree oven for about 15 minutes, or until the crust bubbles up and browns and the toppings begin to caramelize. Serve with crushed red pepper flakes and sea salt. We make this at my house almost weekly, and it's literally different every time. It's like a salad, but it's pizza, so it's fun!


(This is called Jesse's pizza because Jesse actually invented it. He would probably bathe in hummus if he could.)

The Fish that Almost Got Away

OK, I'll admit it. It's just the slightest bit more difficult for me to get inspired about cooking when all the markets are out of season and it's all gray and gloomy outside. My pantry looks more like the boat dealerships around town during the economic crisis than a kitchen in the heart of Food Town. i.e. it's EMPTY. I had my grocery brainstorm written, but after a long day at work, I thought twice out venturing back out. And then it hit me...the freezer! Ah, what a wonderful invention. It magically locks all of that summer and fall goodness in time so I can relive it whenever I feel the urge. OK, so there's some Thai basil, some green beans, some veggie corn dogs...oh yeah, and a veritable mountain of wild-caught albacore tuna.

Brilliant! What better way to invoke the sunshine then to break out the tuna, pulled straight from the Oregon waves by my fearless fishing friends back in July? I spent that sweltering day enjoying the heat wave on my deck, sipping frozen cocktails and soaking up as much Vitamin D as I could stand, but some of my mates were up before the sun and en route to Newport Bay on a single mission: tuna. Needless to say, since my freezer is still mostly overtaken by vacuum-sealed loins of the stuff, they were very successful.

Granted, it's been frozen for a few months now, but I still think you should honor the food you cook, especially when it's literally traveled straight from the ocean to my little stuffed freezer. So, I decided to keep it relatively simple. I found one of the smaller loins (still a honkin' good size) and sliced it into thick medallions, and then for a quick assembly line: flavor, crunch, sear. For flavor, I mixed together some low-sodium soy sauce, a splash of rice wine vinegar (I like the seasoned kind), a shake of sesame oil, ginger, garlic, a blob of local honey, and a healthy dose of Sriracha (that's "Rooster Sauce" to some of you). Half of that went in a little sauce pan on the stove, and the other half stayed on the assembly line. Next on the line was a little plate of Panko, which are Japanese bread crumbs made from bread without crusts. I like these better than regular bread crumbs when you're really going for texture because they are much more coarse and impart and lovely crunch.

So it's as simple as that: tuna in the flavor on both sides, tuna in the crunch on both sides, then tuna in the pan (medium-high, with a bit of oil) and seared for just a couple of minutes on both sides. (Remember, ocean-to-plate tuna does not appreciate being over-cooked.) The sides were just as simple: some whole grain couscous with a bit of salt and lemon zest, and a couple of baby spinach leaves for color and to keep us Popeye-strong. The flavor I mentioned in the little sauce pan was just simmered with a bit of palm sugar to be drizzled over the finished product for an extra punch. Added bonus: it's pretty healthy, too!

Right before we sat down to eat, my boyfriend decided to set the mood by lighting a candle, setting the table, and stabbing himself right through the palm with a kitchen knife. Luckily, he survived and still has two functional hands, but due to this incident I can happily report that this meal is also pretty tasty as a cold entrée.

Viva la freezer!